26.8.07

Destiny awaited!

Back! Yeah! And hopefully, this time I won't have to delete the post half way. Well, if you get
to read this post, then consider yourself lucky. Coz I've been suffering from a huge "not in a
mood to write" syndrome. And trust me, I even thought it had no cure. Coz everytime I would start writing something, two sentences - and there goes my finger to the delete button! I dunno how I managed to do so! And I almost thought that my blog was taking its final breaths. All those debates, comments, questions. Everything seemed to be coming to an end. And that's when I heard about the "writer's block"!

Block as in road block, nose block etc. And not apartment block or building blocks. (Looks like I'm definitly gonna take time recovering!) Anyways. So, when this someone asked me if I were suffering from a writer's block, I saw no reason to say no. Because I knew I wanted to write on a whole lot of things, but the minute I opened my blog and began to type, words kinda got stuck. Nothing happened. And all I coud do was close the browser and sulk!

And as a writer by profession, this was the last thing that I wanted to happen to me. Not knowing what to write! Or even worse, not able to write. A whole lot of things haunted me in the past few weeks. Nothing seemed to be going right. And how I wished to write about it. But I would either stop myself coz I didn't want my state of mind to reflect on my blog or I would just not be in a mood to write.

In fact, the very reason I starting blogging was to find answers to several questions. When I was confused. Didn't know whether what I did was right or wrong. Or what next I should do. And that being the case, the past weeks were when I should have written the most. But then, writing them down and trying to find answers seemed impossible. Because I had to believe that some questions have no answers after all. If they are bound to happen they will.

Destiny. Something that's pre-written. Something I strongly believe in. And if my destiny meant all that's been happening, then so be it. I'm no one to change anyting. And it seemed like destiny ruled so hard that I wasn't even sure of what to write. I left everyting to my fate. Writing it down didn't seem to help. Answers didn't seem right. Decisions no more depended on them. I just followed destiny wherever it went. And deciding to write again just happened on the way.

And now as I write this, I still wonder what my destiny awaits me with. Where it is headed towards. And what it has in store for me. Do I just sit and wait? Or do I have to do something? But again, if it's pre-written, what really can I do? I can't change it? Can I?